As a parent of a school age kid, there is an ambient sound I hear this time of year. The sound weaves into the seasonal landscape like the first hatch of crickets. It becomes as synonymous with the environs as the hum when those crickets rub their spindly legs, creating not only a sound, but the vibration of a swarm.
The ambient sound I hear is the collective groans, sighs, cries and gasps of parents as they try to attend to the blitzkrieg of end-of-the-school year activities -- recitals, portfolio reviews, parent/teacher conferences, celebrations, picnics, teacher appreciation luncheons, graduations, graduation parties, practices, championship games, award ceremonies, etcetera, etcetera, etcetera. Our calendar apps with their chirps, buzzes, whirrs, and chimes add to the cacophony. There are not enough notifications and color codes to keep up with these activities. With all this end-of-school hubbub, how do we manage jobs, households, our pre-school tots, and our other school-age children’s recitals, portfolio reviews, parent/teacher conferences, celebrations, graduations, picnics, etcetera?
Just as the swarm of activity seems as though it might smite you and your calendar alike, a hush descends. All becomes quiet, too quiet. The boxes on the calendar, once crammed full, are now blank. Little empty boxes, side by side - blank, blank, blank, blank, blank - for eight weeks.
#schoolsoutforsummer #endtimes
Generally, we can afford one week of a family summer vacation, so we deduct one from eight which leaves seven free, unscheduled, unguided, unstructured weeks for our children. I am a part-time work-from-home, stay-at-home mom. My husband works full time. While 10-year-old Sam indulges his languidity, I still have to get stuff done. Our conversations begin to sound like a scene from the '50s movie Marty. Marty, a butcher, and his friends meet up every Saturday and engage in the same banter:
Joe: Wadda you feel like doing, Angie?
Angie: I don’t know. Wadda you feel like doing?
Joe: I don’t know. George what are you doing tonight?
Marty: “What are you doing tonight?”
This interchange is the worst case scenario for Sam and my summer script. But, I’ve learned. No matter how many times I fall into the “Wadda you feel like doing, Ange?” trap, I know better than to ask a kid what s/he wants to do, where s/he want to go, or where s/he wants to eat. You need to stick with the easy topics - politics, sex and religion.
#Minecraftisawesome #streamteam #tynker #screentime
As much as Sam would would love it if I dropped him in front of the TV for a Phineas and Ferb Netflix marathon, I’m not sure there are seven weeks of episodes available.
I freely admit I adore screentime as much as my kids do. Plus, screentime is an awesome parental party trick. Just threaten to revoke it and suddenly the living room gets picked up. I try not to make screentime default mode, but it is. As tech savvy as I think I am, I do get sick of the screens and catch myself saying, “back in my day we only had a black and white TV, without a remote, with only four channels. Do you know what it’s like to watch endless reruns of Hee Haw, “Gloom, Despair and Agony on Me”? #Screentime can only get you so far.
#summercamp #summerfest #partyplanner
My least favorite way of keeping the kids from all day #screentime is this one. No matter how many Love Boat episodes I watched, my dream was never to be Julie McCoy, the cruise director. Just as the science suggests, I believe boredom is good for creativity (here is a list of scholarly articles on the subject). And yes I realize I am on a blog that thrives on events and happenings. No doubt, I will shuttle my children from Junior Sail Camp to Corn Festivals to baseball games to the Erie County Fair, but I refuse to plan seven weeks full of shuffleboard on the Lido deck. It’s not good for me nor for my kids. But in this day and age how does a parent structure unstructured time into a kid’s day?
#backintheday #beforehashtags #outside
I’m tempted to say that #backintheday my mom shooed my brother and me out the door in June and let us back inside on Labor Day. Yes, the technology is better now, but our sense of community isn’t. When I was my son Cal’s age (four), I lived on a dead end street in Lackawanna. I picked daisies in the field across from our house, plucked pollywogs from the pond, played Hide and Go Seek in our neighbors’ garages, blocked out the flame rising from the Bethlehem Steel smokestack with my thumb. When I was Sam’s age, I lived in a small town in Oregon. I ambled up Lithia creek in an old pair of sneakers, foraged through bead bins for my macrame projects, flipped through records at Rare Earth, and dozed under bridges with my comic books. If I allowed my children this freedom in the city, we’d end up having PBJs with CPS.
I could go on a diatribe about leashing and corralling kids; about how there aren’t more child molesters or kidnappers around today than there were #backintheday; and, about how as a result of this leashing and corralling, our children aren’t as independent or physically healthy as we were. Unfortunately, a diatribe won’t get Sam and me through the summer. If you are interested in this topic please see Free Range Children for more info.
But, I have found a remedy to my modern parental challenge. And, this remedy for Sam is in accordance with prevailing cultural mores. It comes by way of my younger son, Cal.
#mybackyard #playscape #waldorfeducation #loosepartsplayground
Cal attends an awesome nursery/daycare program at Rose Garden Early Childhood Center on the West Side of Buffalo. Judith Frizlen is the director of the program. She has implemented a “Loose Parts” playscape there. While the focus of The Rose Garden is early childhood, the concept is applicable to kids Sam’s age as well - think building forts, climbing trees, and constructing fire pits.
Here is an excerpt from The Rose Garden newsletter, The Rose Petal, on creating a playscape with “Loose Parts”:
All outdoor playscapes are not alike. Since we value play that is open-ended, inviting the children to bring their developing imaginations, creativity and cooperation skills to their play, we chose the model of a “loose parts” playground. In addition to a sandbox, playhouse, swing and climber, we have logs and stumps, buckets, brooms and other tools.
Why loose parts? According to research available (Kable 2010), these are some reasons:
- Children can use the parts in any way they choose.
- Children can use and change the parts in many ways.
- Loose parts help a child develop more skill and competence than most modern toys.
- Loose parts encourage creativity and a child’s imagination.
- Loose parts can be used in combination with other materials to support more balanced play.
#MySummerPlans
I intend to show Sam how to make a “Loose Parts” playscape wherever we are - in our backyard, on the beach, or at my dad’s house. Rather than shuttling my kids to one zoomy place after another and dragging their toys hither and yon, we will use what can be found, recycled, planted, etc. Put down the screens, unleash our kids, and let them create. Here is a sample of what we have come up with so far.
